Saturday, August 30, 2014

Where my path to crunchy began...

   I personally belong to the military community which obviously requires those of us who choose to love a service member to live far away from the people best suited to help us and encourage us. The military isn’t the only thing that pulls families away from their genetic support systems and forces them to create new ones - it is simply the thing that has pulled me away from mine and personal experience is the source of all my writing. In this day and age, google searches, Facebook groups and blogs (far better written than this one) have become a major source of information, ideas, support, and encouragement. So I come with this humble offering to the internet. I am sharing this with you because I hope my success can help another mom ease the suffering of their child more quickly than I was able, and maybe help eradicate some of the side effects of the anxiety our military (and simply modern) lifestyle seems to have on our sweet babes. 
    We were blessed that my husband was able to be present for almost the entirety of our oldest child’s first two years before being reassigned to a submarine and returning to the life of deployments and workups and long days again. So that you can understand the stress our little man was under from July - November of last year, we moved to a new home, daddy deployed, my son and I moved to Alabama to stay with family for deployment b/c I was pregnant, he lost is only child status, and then this Spring we moved back to CT and Daddy returned in May. The very visible signs of anxiety became disturbingly apparent in my son by October. My handsome boy would wake up from naps and in the mornings with notably less hair. By the end of November there was no hair anywhere except the top of his head - and that was beginning to go. He wasn’t falling asleep right away. He was laying in bed exhausted, worrying, and pulling out his hair. I sought help from a trauma counselor. I read for hours about this sort of thing. I asked his pediatrician (useless). I asked other parents. I did anything and everything anyone suggested.
    In the end, the first part of the solution came as divine providence (just read coincidence if you refuse to believe in God).  I happened to be visiting the greenhouse where my family grows hydroponic lettuces with my sweet kiddos in January when a woman dropped by for a scheduled tour. She happened to be a baby whisper super nanny to the mega wealthy. She noticed my son's hair (everyone did - you would have had to have been blind to not), and politely asked if he was pulling it out. She had seen this before in sweet anxious babies whose parents travelled. The cure she claimed was Omega 3’s. She gave me a brand name. I went home and ordered it on amazon immediately then researched it. It made sense. The brand was quality. It was recommended for four and up. He was only two, but I asked the doctor who was treating him for his constipation issues (on going for over a year - ask if you want to know how we fixed that) and she said it was fine. [please ask your own doctor]. Literally within two weeks he was pulling his hair less often and sleeping better. We added a great multivitamin to my picky eaters regimen and his hair began to grow back. I can’t lie - I was seriously worried there for a while. 
    Then deployment went on and on, and about two months before Daddy was due to come home, my son started to get really worried again - and low and behold another bald spot. We tried everything and for the sake of brevity I will not enumerate here. Suffice it to say - we tried the loving, the bizarre, the educational, and the borderline cruel. Somethings curbed or helped but nothing stopped it…. UNTIL - our wonderful chiropractor asked me how new baby was sleeping, I complained a little and she offered me a sample of serenity essential oil from doTerra. I was largely an oil idiot, but I was interested and intrigued because we were coming out of a flu season, and I had seen tons of my friends singing the praises of oils on FB for keeping their families healthy. I jumped at the opportunity to pick her brain and share what was going on with Monroe - and that I thought it was because he was laying awake and anxious alone. She said to try the serenity on him as well. 
     It was overnight. I now put lavender or serenity (He prefers lavender) on his feet, his PJ shirt, and his pillow nightly. With few exceptions he is asleep within 30 min of us finishing bed time routine. He’s calm and worry free and he’s over due for his fifth or sixth haircut since we started using oils five months ago. 

    Nights are the worst when a loved one is away. Things slow down and generally, especially with a parent (or spouse) the evening is the time of day when their absence is most felt because their presence is most expected. The help oils has given all of us in getting to sleep during all the times our favorite submariner is gone is priceless. If I could make Dr. Who take me back in history to the person who first pressed lavender oil so I could hug them - I would. My sweet boy has help calming his anxious mind for Daddy’s safety, and my heart no longer breaks every time I see his little head go whirling by on some new grand adventure slaying dragons under the dining room table or hauling things to his latest “struction site.”

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